(no subject)

Date: 19 Jul 2010 10:25 am (UTC)
Now, because I like this so much, and because the feel is so right in much of it, I want to Brit-pick it to make it, especially these bits that are in a little English village, as little English village as possible. I do this in a separate comment so you can ignore it / clear it away later / whatever you wish.

Vase on the mantle; I think we generally call it a mantelpiece, not a mantle on its own. Vase makes me go a bit arg with an Americanism next to it, in fact, because then I can hear it being rhymed with 'base' not 'cars', but changing mantle may help this.

Brits would leave the 'of' in and say 'dive out of the window'.

I'm in two minds about 'aww, shucks' because it's not like we never say it but it's a consciously American thing to say. But sometimes that's what you want to say, like using 'je ne sais quoi' to suggest a stylishly French type of mysterious.

Grading; that's marking here.

Tires... see, I can look past center / centre or the like, but tire is harder because tire means something else too and therefore has to be decoded, which we don't normally have to do because tyres are only the ones on the car.

A ride would be a lift here. 'D'you want a lift?' And, in that and the rest of this conversation, dropping all the initial words out makes it sound more American. So:
'D'you want a lift?'
'You sure? Are we all gonna fit?'
'Have you got somewhere to be, Dad?'
...sounds more British. Odd, really.

Um, I think curb suffers from the same problem as tire and should be kerb.

Is it an old Mini, a classic Mini, like Rory's in TEH? I hope it is. In which case, in case you're not sure, since it's undefined here, and you happen to write them getting out of it again, there never was a four-door classic Mini and someone has to get out of the front to let people out of the back. You *can* fit three tall (albeit preferably not wide) people in the back, classic Minis are deceptively roomy in the absence of, you know, airbags, crumple zones, any of that tedious stuff, but the seats are really low and the whole car except River will be a parade of knees. *grins*




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About me:

Parapsychological librarian and friendly neighborhood heretic.