FIC: Friday Night
10 Dec 2008 10:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Title: Friday Night
Fandom: HIMYM, Barney/Robin
Length: 700 words
Warning: Weirdness ahead.
Legalese: If I owned HIMYM, I would not decorate with Chinese checkerboards. Sadly, Bays/Thomas own all and did not choose to consult me.
AN: Delayed reply to this prompt by
1angelette in the last drabble-a-thon. Naked man!
When Robin returned to the living room, several thoughts ran through her head simultaneously:
1) Nature has been kind to that man.
2) Why, Barney, why?
3) Whoa, déjà vu. (Heh.)
4) I was only gone, like, 20 seconds!
5) It’s not like this worked the last time he tried it.
6) You know . . . I’ve done worse.
7) I could really go for a grilled cheese sandwich.
Before she could sort any of this jumble out, however, Barney looked up from his iPhone, natural as you please, and spoke: “So, James Bond is all sold out, but you know that Sound of Music sing-along thing? They’re doing it at this theater downtown on Saturday. We should totally dress up for Rocky Horror instead, show up ‘by accident,’ and pick up nuns.”
Robin stared in mute astonishment at the man who, a mere 20 seconds ago, had been sitting on her couch—fully clothed, mind you—looking up movie times and waiting for her to grab her coat and who now, for all appearances, had not budged from the spot—except for the arresting fact that every stitch of clothing had vanished from his body.
“B-b-b-barney!” Robin sputtered out her reply.
“What? I’ll tell you: I’ve scoped one of these things out before, and at least half the nuns are guys.”
“Barney!” This time she was more forceful.
“Do you already have plans? Because I thought that thing with bus stop dude fell through.”
“Barney!!!” Robin put one hand on her hip and gestured in wide-eyed frustration at his naked body.
“Fine, you can be Tim Curry. But you’re gonna have to find your own shoes; I doubt we wear the same size.”
Robin snapped: “So not the point! Why are you naked on my couch?!?!”
Barney looked credibly confused. “Wha---? You doin’ alright there, Robin? Not that that’s a bad idea or anything. You looking for a little somethin’ somethin’?” And he began to loosen an invisible tie.
“No, no, no!! No!” Robin reached out a hand to stop the already naked man from stripping down again. The voices returned:
1) Well, that’s just weird and ironic.
2) But . . . but . . . naked! Want!
3) Scherbatsky! *mental slap* Get it back together!
4) Maybe he’s really not naked . . . ?
5) I forgot to pick up my dry cleaning.
6) He was going to let me be Tim Curry.
7) Sandwich!
Barney shrugged: “Your loss.” He re-adjusted the non-existent knot and smoothed down his invisible lapels. Robin very deliberately tried not to think about what the cut of those lapels did for his chest.
“So the movie’s a no-go,” he continued. “What’s our back-up plan?”
1) I got yer back-up plan right here.
2) Shut up! Shut up!
3) How far is he going to go with this, exactly? You gonna let him out of the house like that?
4) Heh. We should totally let him out of the house like that.
5) No, Barney, you can be Tim Curry.
6) Frying butter . . . big fluffy hunks of bread . . . a little cheddar . . . .
7) No. Seriously. Sandwich!
Robin flopped into the armchair with a sigh. “I dunno, Barney. I’m kinda tired. Wanna just scavenge some food and find a monster truck rally on cable?”
“Yeah, sounds goo . . .” The lock turned in the door, and Ted walked in.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa . . . um, Robin? Menu?” Robin’s cheeks flared brilliant red, and she decided to take a quiet moment to stare a hole in the coffee table before turning to face her roommate. She swallowed.
“Hey, Ted! Late night at the office? Grab us a few beers and join us.”
“Yeah, we’re gonna find some monster trucks.” Barney remained unabashed. He returned to his iPhone. “Bids start at $200.”
Ted blinked a few times. He looked at Barney, eyebrows raised. He looked at Robin, who smiled back innocently. He looked at Barney again.
Barney glanced back up. “Ted?”
Ted blinked once more. “Whatever. Say, Barney . . . since you’re dressed for it, you wanna make me a grilled cheese sandwich?”
Fandom: HIMYM, Barney/Robin
Length: 700 words
Warning: Weirdness ahead.
Legalese: If I owned HIMYM, I would not decorate with Chinese checkerboards. Sadly, Bays/Thomas own all and did not choose to consult me.
AN: Delayed reply to this prompt by
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
When Robin returned to the living room, several thoughts ran through her head simultaneously:
1) Nature has been kind to that man.
2) Why, Barney, why?
3) Whoa, déjà vu. (Heh.)
4) I was only gone, like, 20 seconds!
5) It’s not like this worked the last time he tried it.
6) You know . . . I’ve done worse.
7) I could really go for a grilled cheese sandwich.
Before she could sort any of this jumble out, however, Barney looked up from his iPhone, natural as you please, and spoke: “So, James Bond is all sold out, but you know that Sound of Music sing-along thing? They’re doing it at this theater downtown on Saturday. We should totally dress up for Rocky Horror instead, show up ‘by accident,’ and pick up nuns.”
Robin stared in mute astonishment at the man who, a mere 20 seconds ago, had been sitting on her couch—fully clothed, mind you—looking up movie times and waiting for her to grab her coat and who now, for all appearances, had not budged from the spot—except for the arresting fact that every stitch of clothing had vanished from his body.
“B-b-b-barney!” Robin sputtered out her reply.
“What? I’ll tell you: I’ve scoped one of these things out before, and at least half the nuns are guys.”
“Barney!” This time she was more forceful.
“Do you already have plans? Because I thought that thing with bus stop dude fell through.”
“Barney!!!” Robin put one hand on her hip and gestured in wide-eyed frustration at his naked body.
“Fine, you can be Tim Curry. But you’re gonna have to find your own shoes; I doubt we wear the same size.”
Robin snapped: “So not the point! Why are you naked on my couch?!?!”
Barney looked credibly confused. “Wha---? You doin’ alright there, Robin? Not that that’s a bad idea or anything. You looking for a little somethin’ somethin’?” And he began to loosen an invisible tie.
“No, no, no!! No!” Robin reached out a hand to stop the already naked man from stripping down again. The voices returned:
1) Well, that’s just weird and ironic.
2) But . . . but . . . naked! Want!
3) Scherbatsky! *mental slap* Get it back together!
4) Maybe he’s really not naked . . . ?
5) I forgot to pick up my dry cleaning.
6) He was going to let me be Tim Curry.
7) Sandwich!
Barney shrugged: “Your loss.” He re-adjusted the non-existent knot and smoothed down his invisible lapels. Robin very deliberately tried not to think about what the cut of those lapels did for his chest.
“So the movie’s a no-go,” he continued. “What’s our back-up plan?”
1) I got yer back-up plan right here.
2) Shut up! Shut up!
3) How far is he going to go with this, exactly? You gonna let him out of the house like that?
4) Heh. We should totally let him out of the house like that.
5) No, Barney, you can be Tim Curry.
6) Frying butter . . . big fluffy hunks of bread . . . a little cheddar . . . .
7) No. Seriously. Sandwich!
Robin flopped into the armchair with a sigh. “I dunno, Barney. I’m kinda tired. Wanna just scavenge some food and find a monster truck rally on cable?”
“Yeah, sounds goo . . .” The lock turned in the door, and Ted walked in.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa . . . um, Robin? Menu?” Robin’s cheeks flared brilliant red, and she decided to take a quiet moment to stare a hole in the coffee table before turning to face her roommate. She swallowed.
“Hey, Ted! Late night at the office? Grab us a few beers and join us.”
“Yeah, we’re gonna find some monster trucks.” Barney remained unabashed. He returned to his iPhone. “Bids start at $200.”
Ted blinked a few times. He looked at Barney, eyebrows raised. He looked at Robin, who smiled back innocently. He looked at Barney again.
Barney glanced back up. “Ted?”
Ted blinked once more. “Whatever. Say, Barney . . . since you’re dressed for it, you wanna make me a grilled cheese sandwich?”
(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 03:28 am (UTC)Especially the last line, and Robin's thought process. Also, Barney pretending he was still clothed. Hee!
(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 04:57 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 03:53 am (UTC)Such a wonderful read, I really enjoyed this.
(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 04:58 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 12 Dec 2008 03:48 am (UTC)Always happy to make someone's night.
(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 07:29 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 15 Dec 2008 07:54 pm (UTC)you have to join/watch to see the entries :)
(no subject)
Date: 15 Dec 2008 09:27 pm (UTC)Thank you again for the nominations.
(no subject)
Date: 16 Dec 2008 06:58 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 08:21 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 03:50 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 10:22 am (UTC)Tim Curry WIN! Oh my god. The thought alone.
This story is going in my memories. RIGHT NOW.
(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 03:57 am (UTC)Thank you so much for liking that part--it made me laugh, but I felt like I was going out on a limb. Like maybe I was crossing a line from funny to just plain weird . . . Come to think of it, that sounds like a good description of Tim Curry (she said with the utmost love and respect). I liked the idea that Barney *already* has a Tim Curry costume; it made sense in my mind.
(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 10:00 am (UTC)The idea was far too hot for my little mind to cope with. Barney+stockings+basque+heels+makeup=brain explosion.
(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 05:20 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 04:00 am (UTC)Thank you--it seemed to me that the tricky part of the prompt was what Barney would do when Robin confronts him with the obvious facts. How does he deflect? And of course Barney is going to take any mention of nakedness as an invitation.
Thanks for reading!
(no subject)
Date: 11 Dec 2008 05:46 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 04:01 am (UTC)The world would be a much sadder place. And thank you for commenting!
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Date: 11 Dec 2008 09:09 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 12 Dec 2008 05:21 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 01:46 am (UTC)"I Got Yer Backup Plan Right Here." I LOVE train-of-thought stories but don't see them much in HIMYM; this is great. Short and so, so sweet.
(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 04:15 am (UTC)"*wonders if your!R/B are actually Going To Do It...."
You know, I'm honestly not sure. At first I really just wanted to play around with the weirdness of the situation, and then having Ted show up would seem to put a damper on things, but as I did Robin's lists her thoughts kept getting more and more suggestive, so . . .
I'm gonna say they do it the next night after they're thrown out of the Sound of Music.
(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 05:19 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 12 Dec 2008 11:38 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 07:20 pm (UTC)ok stoped, I was beginning to think Robin really was imagining him naked and then Ted comes in!
Loved Robin's mental lists or thought prcess - or whatever you wan to call it - LOVE IT!
And very nice insert that Barney cooks naked.
(no subject)
Date: 12 Dec 2008 11:33 pm (UTC)I did think about going that way, but in the end I thought it was funnier to bring Ted in and have Robin start pretending too. And then:
"And very nice insert that Barney cooks naked."
I thought of the "punch line" and decided I absolutely had to go that way.
Thank you for reading and commenting!
P.S.: Your icon is awesome. I am afraid it will take my lunch money.